Sick.

      Finally, I’m sick. After all the mandarin oranges, biscuits, snacks and junks, tons of carbonated drinks, my body finally can’t take it anymore. Well, I’m not the only one at fault. Everywhere you go on CNY, they don’t serve you plain water. Some refuses to give me water when I requested for it. There! I’m sick! Happy?!

      And I’m wide awake at 6 in the morning, sitting in front of the computer blogging and finding stuff for assignment due end of March. How geekier can anyone get?

      I hate being sick. But I hate running nose more. My nose is like water hydrant and it’d be a wonder I’m not dehydrated.

CNY and tarot readings.

      End of Chinese New Year.. This year’s ang pao collection is pretty much the same as every year, but I ain’t complaining. After all the gatherings with families, came the gathering I’ve been patiently waiting. Friends. My second family.

      Its been a while since we last hang out, all busy with their studies and life. Living in different states didn’t make things easier either. Been catching up on how everyone has been through talks of mouth. I’m glad to see them all excelling in life.

Vinie, most probably the busiest of them all, is quite happy with college and works.
Jess, going away for India in May. Gonna miss you very much, Jess!
Sonia, happily in love.
And the rest of the gang, tuitions! Haha! I can see Yap busy booking bus tickets for the next tuition sessions while Phoon read’s everybody’s future with her tarot reading.
<Edited>And not to forget, the annoying Bex that tagged along that day. Busy exchanging loud secretive whispers with Phoon about some boy who is supposedly to be cute etc.

      Talking about tarot, I had mine read the other day. And it didn’t came out right. I kindof knew that I would get bad readings, but silently hoping I’m wrong. Here’s my reading according to my understanding. Phoon failed badly in explaining the results. Haha!

My past : I am a person full of spirit and determination. Great success in 
                 everything that I venture into.
 I’m a successful athlete and a politician. I
                 would continue running my family business.

According to Yap, I’m a great politician. Phoon said, I’m an athlete. Ching said, this reading is accurate. <Edited>Bex said something I don’t really remember. I felt, its true.

My current state : I failed one or two of my subjects in studies. Loss of hope and 
                                determination. Loss my way while struggling to become who I
                                am and now, clueless and pointless to what I should do.

Yap, silent. Phoon said, “Ei, you got concentrate or not just now because if not it will come out differently wan wor!?” Ching asked, did you fail in your exam?? <Edited> Bex said to not trust tarot cards and that its just for fun. Plus Phoon was no expert either. I felt, its true. I am loss and I don’t know anything for sure anymore.

My future : I will fail badly in my business and I will run away when problem comes
                    along. Irresponsible, is what I am.

All, silent.

In the end : I will learn to stand up on my own two feet and not needing the help of
                     parents. After all my struggle, I will succeed.

Yap said, finally something comes out right. Phoon said, Don’t worry lah. See!Good wan in the end. <Edited> Bex was, busy eating up all the biscuits and choosing nice looking ones too. I am, hoping the future won’t be too rough on me.

So there you have it. My tarot reading. There’s another reading about my love life. Haha… Let me just keep it to myself

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

   Happy Chinese New Year! Let the pig in and the dog out… Let the ‘ong’ in and the ‘suah’ out… Let me in for some ang paos! Yeay! Its time again for celebrations, makan makans, ang pao ang paos, drinking drinkings, talking talkings and laughing laughings.

  The ‘tuen yuen’ or reunion dinner this year, is pretty much the same as last year. And the year before. And the year before before. And the year before before before. Which is?

Working at dad’s shop from morning, saying ‘thank you’s and faking a smile and cursing with Bex under our breaths. Sent the workers home at about 8.15pm and reach home at 9pm something. Got to my uncle’s house late for the supposedly dinner. Eating only leftovers from what all the uncles, aunties and cousins left for us after their second round. Cold dinner, didn’t even bother to reheat the food. Too hungry and too late.

      Yeah, Happy Chinese New Year alright.

      Cousins all looked great… The boys got handsome-r and the girls (excluding Bex-Brooke-Aubrey Romaine-Moonlight-Daylight-and-I-don’t-know-whats-your-name-anymore) got prettier. Truth be told, glad to see that some of the boys got pimples! Hahahaha! I’m jealous of their flawless skin. But failed to see pimple on King’s face. Where’d you hide it?? Darn! Shocked

      The gathering with friends have been planned well ahead of time. Can’t wait to see them again. Gossips to be shared! Nothing should be left out!

      Anyway anyhow, happy holidays! Really needed the break…

Toilet and Dreams

 

Toilets. Loo. Washrooms. Ladies room. Or whatever people call it these days. The other day, there’s this toilet that I was using. It was so damn dirty despite it being a nice place. It just spoils the whole environment and atmosphere. There you are, happily enjoying your meal and the scenery at the restaurant and suddenly nature calls. And when you gotta go, you gotta go! In you go to the toilet. Welcoming you are, stinking smell and puke. It just spoils the moment! Yes, you need good environment while releasing yourself. Its not only me who says so. The survey says so too.

 

So I think to myself, one day if I do open a restaurant, toilet is going to be one thing on top of the “Important things to notice“. Food, no. 1 priority of course. Followed by cleanliness. Be it the cleanliness of the staff, restaurant or the toilet. I’d employ workers especially for the toilet. Not any mak cik- mak cik or aunty. Should never run out of toilet roll. Plus, air freshener! =P

Don’t want no shit or fart smell.

 

Then, the pricing must be equally economical too. Not too expensive and well, not too cheap. Or else, where would I profit right?! Parking and accessibility are another factors too.

 

Note: This sounds like some high school essay!

 

The chef, me of course! I’m a good cook too. Once I remember what ingredients to put in each dishes and how to stir stuff. Tee hee!

 

Best dishes so far:

  1. Stella’s Specialty Campbell Mushroom Soup
  2. Tuesday’s Special Hotdog
  3. Perfect Half-boiled eggs with Secret Recipe
  4. Burger oh Burger!
  5. Steamed Dory Fillet Fist
  6. Kangkong
  7. Baby Spinach Fried with Special Ingredients
  8. Stella’s Special Scramble Eggs

 

8 dishes! Not bad, huh?! If you are wondering why the names are so different, let me explain. I’ve read somewhere in some cook book that the longer you name you dishes, the more attractive it is. Tee hee! = P

 

 

Oh ya… Public toilets nowadays, cannot be trusted. Each time I’m in one, I can’t stop thinking what the last person using did. Did she step on it? Or did she squat halfway? Or did she (Malaysians generously do) step on the toilet bowl?

 

There was a notice at the toilet near School Of Applied Sciences’ toilet a while ago.

 

Do not step on the toilet bowl. You would not get deadly disease sitting on it. Nor will you get AIDS, skin disease, or (some other disease known to human being).

 

I find it amusing. Tee hee!

Microsoft One Note. Testing, testing!

Since I can’t be online so often, I’ve found a way where I can dot down things that’s been on my mind. Through Microsoft One Note. Here it is…

 


 

I’m here, sitting at the 3rd level, waiting to go home. The lab session just now was like usual. Which is, boring! The communication gap, is making me so frustrated. And yes, I decided to distance myself. I refuse to learn Mandarin. I know it’ll do me good… I just don’t wanna learn it. Anyhow, weather outside is looking ok, I guess. Windy and gloomy. Definitely better than hot and dry.

 

Current mood: Frustrated! Why? Been sitting here for an hour plus plus, trying to connect to the Internet, the freedom to the world, and failing. Pssh! And this ladies and gentlemen, is what you call, Technology.

 

Wow! I never knew that Microsoft Office OneNote is so useful! Its been there in my laptop for ages and I just never gave it a try. Now that I have, I’m not getting my hands out of it! Tee hee! So far so good. Just wish they came with the emoticons though.

 

That is just typically me. Ever so afraid to try new things. I don’t know why. I just, don’t. I don’t even feel like trying new things. I’m one of those who just uses, eats and drinks the same ol same ol. The good thing is… I seldom get bored of using, eating and drinking same ol same ol. Tee hee! = ) Well, I did at some point in my life, got bored of drinking water. And I did, got crazy all over water. Gotta get my head fixed someday.

 

Anyway, Chinese New Year is next next week. Yeay! I can’t wait till holiday. I’ll find any excuse to skip college these days. Any!! You can’t really blame me ya know. I mean, the weather is oh so terrible these past few weeks. Plus, there’s not parking within the campus. Plus plus, there’s like another one trillion working hours left before week 14 comes. I definitely like working in the lab under Mr. Hor than in the marketing department.

 

Note: Defragmenting my laptop now. The first time ever that I have done so on any computer. Result of boredom. Oh… p.s: already 55% done. Yeay!

 

Back to the what I was saying. Mr. Hor is very nice man. Well mannered and always have stuff for me to do! Which is a big thing. You see, marketing is …. Marketing! Busy and stuff. You’d think that they’ll have stuff left unfinished. But no. So, I can’t finish my hours! Plus, this Christina person, she’s never around. So I get tossed like a rag doll between the personnel there. And by the way, they are very unfriendly. Pssh!

Another thing I like now is that, I get to cheat the hours easily! = )  A few extra hours every now and then.

 

Time now: 5:12pm. Pssh! Another 15 more minutes left to wait.

 

Note: Finish defragmenting! Result= 83% space left for me to put in rubbish! Good news. By the way, it smells here from where I’m sitting. Grr…

 

Oh ya! Few weeks ago, when I was working in the Pharmacy Project Lab (I think..), washing the test tubes, conical flask etc, I smelt something awful. Now, I’m pretty sure that it wasn’t the chemicals (though it is pretty bad too). And the smell, it was familiar. Disgustingly familiar. Fart! Bluek! The lab assistant was bending down towards the small cabinet and he farted. Omg!

 

Another thing that happened recently. A girl, from what I heard, who lived at Angkasa condo nearby college, was raped. The girl is from my college too. And apparently, she was raped by a black man who, from what I heard, is also studying at the same place!

 

Note: College sucks!

 

Continue. I really do pity the girl. And then it struck me. It could’ve been me! Dang! And from what I heard, college admin is importing a lot of these blacks. No prejudice or whatsoever, but college is pretty much like Nigeria now. They are supposedly, from what I heard, intelligent people sponsored by their government to continue study here.

But so far, most of them are just fooling around and enter class to chit chat with friends.

 

Lols! Pretty much like most of the locals too!

 

But their problem was much more serious.

 

3 minutes left till 5.30pm. Better save and pack things. It’s a Friday night! Most probably going to The Curve and hit the bar.

 

<Continuation>

So, home again. Funny thing is, I can’t get my mind of Office OneNote! Tee hee! Been thinking about what to write in. Can’t access the net whenever I wanted so, with this, I can dot down what I ter-think of. As long as I can get my hands on the com, anyway.

 

Mum called not long ago, asking me about the bomb incident just around my area. I don’t even know. Talk about being frog under coconut shell, man. Should have been exciting…

Life…

Kingsley said to me,

Your life begins when you live for something.

 

This got me thinking… What am I living for? A couple of years ago, I believe that we have our destiny planned by God? Or something more superior than us humans. Still, I believe that we can determine our future, based on our decisions in life, based on the path we take.

 

And now, at age 19 (nearing 19 actually), I don’t know if I am as sure as I was back then. To be honest, I’m living my life by waiting for tomorrow to come. Dealing each day as it comes by. Purposes of life? I have no clue anymore.

 

Quoting from Socrates if I may (or is it Aristotle?),

The ultimate purpose of life is to achieve HAPPINESS.

 

Happiness. This one word that makes all the differences in the world. One word yet it holds so much meaning.

 

I hope that my heart believes the future has stored happiness for me. But my mind tells me otherwise.

 

Sometimes I feel so tired of living. Happiness sucked out of me. At some point of my life, I was a suicidal case. I nearly killed myself. Life was nothing but an empty Tupperware. Luckily, I survived. Not knowing and not having a goal to live life with is … indescribable.

 

I’m surviving still.

 

I’m scared and fill with fears. I fear not knowing of what may happen to my life in the future. Its times like this that I hope Doraemon is with me, with Pintu Sesuka Hati. I fear that my life won’t turn out the way I planned out. Having a steady, secured and highly paid job that I love, having a family that’s loving and happy. Having the American Dream, like what they say. I’m scared that some of my decisions will cost me dearly. Scared that I will run out of track. Scared and fears, filling up most of me.

 

I don’t like and hate not knowing. I want answers and I want them now! I’m curious and furious. I don’t like not knowing. It makes me grumpy and feels weak.

 

A someone once told me, not to worry and that I will turn out fine. Still, I’m not satisfied and it ain’t easy satisfying me. I need to know for sure, thus I’m working hard. Regardless of what my point of life is right now, I’m working hard. Just in case. Like the Malay proverb,

Sediakan paying sebelum hujan

 

And getting the umbrella ready is what I’m doing, I fear I will regret that I don’t turn out the way I want to and blame this time I’m in now for not working hard enough. I feel more secured knowing that I don’t have to regret later on if I do become a beggar in future. As least, I worked hard.

Desperados

      It really gets on my nerves whenever I read, 
            “Add me lar. All leng chai and leng lui… Add me at whatever@hotmail.com Faster add me ohh… You won’t regret…

      Seems so desperate too me. Too desperate. Hate it even more if its in the About Me section. No description, no nothing but just waiting for people to add you.

      I’ve given up Friendster. The popularity chase there, gives no meaning anymore. Sick of seeing all the wannabe’s. I don’t get the point of opening it everyday and checking how many people have seen your lame-ol page or how many testimonials you got or how many friends you have.

      Its all too virtual. The friends are too virtual.

      The next thing that bugs me a lot is the forward messages. The ones that threatens if you don’t pass it on. Craps! Plain silly if you believe in all those and if you feel you need to forward it to all of your hundreds of so-called friends.

      Last but not least, the cutesy face of the girls. Out of the 50 pictures (max that you can put), nearly 48 are of the same kind. The same pose. The same “oh see my crystal eyes and cute mouth I’m making”. Makes me wanna laugh out loud.

      The things people do for popularity!